Cut and scars
by Faberrittanainthetardis
Summary: Emily's encounters with Paige's issue of self injury. One time she found evidence of it and one time she caught her red handed. Paily fic.
1. Chapter 1

**Warning: SI trigger. Don't read if you're likely to be triggered. **

Paige grinned to herself as she walked briskly up the stairs carrying a glass of coke in either hand. Her parents were out of town for some kind of business conference in New York and Paige had invited Emily around to stay for the night. Emily had accepted of course, grateful for the opportunity to spend time with her girlfriend.

"We're out of Pepsi." Paige announced as she walked into her room. She paused when she found Emily sitting on the edge of the bed, her gaze fixed on something in her hand. "What do you have there?"

Paige carefully set the glasses on her bedside table as Emily looked up to reveal eyes filled with worry.

"What's this?" She asked, holding the object up between her thumb and forefinger.

Paige froze at the sight of the familiar, shiny object. She hadn't laid eyes on it for a month or so, since the last big fight she'd had with her parents regarding her future. She'd refashioned it that night in a fit of hurt frustration. She had torn the protective plastic away with from the blades using her fingers and teeth, effectively converting the small object into something much more harmful. She hadn't used either of the blades that night. The effort it had taken to free them from the protective casing and the numerous tiny cuts to her fingers had been enough to dull the emotions that had been raging through her, giving her a chance to think clearly. She'd realised how much of a bad idea relapsing would be and with her fingertips throbbing, she'd concealed the blades in her dresser with her first aid supplies.

"Paige?" Emily asked again.

"It's a razor blade." Paige finally answered in a hoarse voice.

"Why do you have it?" Emily's eyes scanned Paige's body as if she was searching for signs that she'd been cutting.

"Why do _you_ have it?" Paige retorted before she could stop herself. As soon as the words left her mouth she inwardly cringed. She had a habit of automatically jumping to the defensive whenever her secret was threatened.

Emily had the good grace to look guilty. "I'm sorry. I wasn't snooping. I was looking for the T-shirt I left here and I found this in your dresser." As quickly as it had appeared her guilty expression faded back into worry. "Paige, why do you have it?"

"I haven't used it." Paige answered quietly. She moved to sit on the bed next to Emily with a resigned sigh. "I keep it in case I need it."

"What do you mean?"

Paige thoughtfully chewed her lip, trying to think of a way to explain without worrying her girlfriend any more than necessary. Finally she shifted on the bed so that she was facing Emily directly. "I don't intend to use it but I keep it in my dresser in case I ever need to."

Emily looked stricken by the idea of Paige hurting herself. "Paige…"

"Not all the time." Paige hurried to add. "It's not a regular thing anymore. This probably sounds insane to you but there's a process I have to go through before I can use it."

"A process?" Emily's brow furrowed in worried confusion. "I don't understand."

"I throw the blade out right after I use it." Paige tried her best to explain despite the fact that she knew Emily wouldn't understand. "And then the next time I _need_ to use it I usually end up _not_ using it because I have to find a blade and remove the plastic before it'll work properly…" she trailed off at the confused look on Emily's face. "It's complicated."

"It sounds dangerous." Emily said in concern as she glanced at the small blade in her hand.

"Em, don't worry." Paige reached out to grip Emily's free hand, causing her to look up at her. "I haven't done anything in almost a year. I swear it isn't a regular thing anymore."

"But you still have these." Emily argued her worry evident. "And I saw the first aid supplies you keep in your dresser."

"It's just a precaution."

"Paige, you have butterfly stitches in there!" Emily's voice was growing progressively louder with her rising anxiety. "Whatever you're doing to yourself obviously isn't just scratches."

Paige was silent, unsure as to how to reassure her girlfriend without outright lying to her. She couldn't promise that she wouldn't do it again but that's what Emily wanted to hear.

"I thought you stopped." Emily said, sounding almost betrayed as if even the thought of Paige hurting herself was enough to hurt her too. "You told me you stopped."

"I have stopped." Paige insisted. "I haven't cut for a _year_ Emily."

"A year?" Emily echoed, only just realizing something. "So you did it when we were dating on and off?"

Paige hesitated for a moment before answering. "Yes."

"And you didn't tell me?" Emily asked in a wounded tone of voice. There was a change in her expression and Paige instantly knew what the next thing to come out of her mouth would be. "Was it my…?"

"No!" Paige interrupted with a venomous shake of her head. "It wasn't your fault. Don't even think that. I was going through a lot back then and it seemed like an easy way to cope."

Emily nodded as if she understood what Paige was telling her.

"Look." Paige began to reach out for the blade only for Emily to pull it away at the last second, a wary look on her face. "Emily, it's okay."

Emily wavered for a moment before tentatively handing the small blade over. Paige stood up and walked over to the bin where she proceeded to bend the blade in half. Emily watched in concern as Paige repeated the action a few times before the thin blade finally snapped in two.

"There." Paige announced, dropping the pieces into the trash. She turned to Emily with a weak smile. "It's gone."

"You have more." Emily accused, though her voice remained soft.

"I do." Paige couldn't lie in response to Emily's defeated tone. She walked back over to the bed and resumed her position next to Emily. "I'm not going to use them."

"Promise?"

Paige opened her mouth to confirm her promise but promptly closed it again.

"Paige?"

"I don't want to lie to you Em." Paige interrupted honestly. "I can't promise that I won't but I can promise that I'll try not to."

Emily nodded and turned her gaze to the ground.

Paige immediately recognised the quiet disappointment that typically suggested that Emily was annoyed or frustrated. "I'm sorry."

"I'm not mad at you." Emily looked up and gave Paige a weak smile. "I just hate that you have them."

Paige nodded in understanding.

"Can I see them?" Emily requested cautiously, her hand moving to rest lightly on Paige's knee.

"See them?" Paige echoed in confusion.

"Yeah." Emily nodded in confirmation. "You know…the scars."

"Oh." Paige muttered, averting her eyes for a moment. "Those."

"If you don't want me to see them you don't have to show me." Emily said quickly, not wanting Paige to feel pressurised into doing something she didn't want to do. "I can wait."

"No, it's okay." Paige put on a brave face as she stood up from the bed, her hands moving to the button of her three quarter length jeans. "It wouldn't be the first time I've bared my scars to you, metaphorically speaking of course."

Emily nodded silently. She could tell by the way Paige was speaking that she was nervous about what she was about to do.

Paige flicked the button of her jeans open and pulled the zip down. She took a deep breath before she slowly inched her jeans down enough to reveal the top of her thighs.

Emily watched in silence as the thin scars covering the top of her girlfriend's thighs were revealed. Some of them were paler than Paige's skin tone, obviously having faded over time while others still looked pink and raw. Emily tentatively reached out to run her fingers over the raised skin of one of the newest looking scars. A couple of seconds passed in silence before she glanced up. Paige was watching her apprehensively, obviously unsure as to what her reaction would be. "How have I never seen these before?"

"I do my best to cover them up when I know I'm going to have to swim." Paige explained, tugging her jeans back up. She quickly flicked the button back into place and pulled the zipper up. "Other than that we haven't really…" she paused as a blush crept over her cheeks. "You know."

Emily nodded in understanding as Paige sat on the bed next to her. Despite the fact that they'd been dating for months they were taking things slow and hadn't gotten to the point in their relationship where they had seen every inch of each other's bodies. "Thank you…for sharing this with me."

Paige shrugged and bashfully looked away. "I guess it's better that you're warned about it. It would be a nasty surprise if you found out in the middle of...something."

Emily frowned at the self-deprecating tone of Paige's voice. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Paige looked slightly uncomfortable. "I mean when we have…"

"I didn't mean that!" Emily quickly intercepted Paige's answer. "I meant the part about the 'nasty surprise'."

"Oh." Paige muttered. "I just mean that it's not exactly attractive and it's better that you know they're there so you don't get grossed out when we eventually take that step."

"Paige." Emily said in such a soft, caring voice that Paige couldn't help but look up to meet her gaze. She found warm if somewhat troubled eyes staring back at her. "Nothing about you is gross."

"I know you have to say that as my girlfriend…"

"I don't have to say anything as your girlfriend." Emily disagreed with a shake of her head. "I'm not lying to you. I adore every single part of you, scars and all."

Paige smiled shakily at that, an astonished breath escaping her lips as she looked down at her lap. "They're just embarrassing."

Emily barely caught the mumbled out response. She placed two fingers under Paige's chin to gently urge her head up. She smiled softly when their eyes met. "Hey."

Paige was unable to resist Emily's sparkling eyes coupled with the way she was biting her lip in an attempt to subdue her smile and eventually her own tugged at her lips. She knew that Emily wasn't laughing at her, far from it actually if the pure adoration in her eyes was anything to go by.

"Hey." She breathed out.

"You shouldn't be embarrassed." Emily continued, her expression sobering slightly. "Your scars aren't something to be ashamed of. They show how far you've come, how much you've grown since back then."

Paige frowned slightly, unsure as to whether she could really say that she'd gotten past her self-injury. "I guess…" she paused briefly before continuing with an afterthought. "They're still gross though."

Emily playfully narrowed her eyes. "Well I disagree and since I'm always right…"

Paige chuckled softly at that. "Because you're not biased at all."

"I'm not." Emily leaned forward and kissed her girlfriend firmly to silence her inevitable argument. "Besides…" she muttered between quick, barely there kisses. "Scars are badass…and poetic…and hot…and…"

Growing frustrated with the teasing kisses, Paige moved her hand behind Emily's neck to keep her from moving back and kissed her back passionately. Emily didn't seem to mind being interrupted as she shifted her hand to Paige's cheek for leverage and leaned into the kiss, effectively deepening it. Pressing her free hand against Paige's shoulder she gently eased her back onto the bed.

"Just so you know…" Emily said breathlessly as she pulled back much to Paige's disappointment. "If I find any more of those things hidden around, I'm throwing them out."

"Okay." Paige agreed before she closed the small distance to reclaim Emily's lips with her own. It hadn't crossed her mind for a second that Emily would allow her to keep the blades so the warning didn't come as a surprise.

"I mean it." Emily mumbled against Paige's lips.

"I know." Paige breathed distractedly.

Emily was about to reiterate what she'd said when Paige lightly nipped at her bottom lip and all other thoughts disappeared from her mind.

TBC.


	2. Chapter 2

**Title: Cuts and scars (part 2)**

**Summary: Emily's encounters with Paige's issue of self injury. One time she found evidence of it and one time she caught her red handed. Paily fic.**

**Rating: T**

**Word count: 3,723**

**A/N: I might add another part - 'one time Emily misjudged a situation' or something because I have an idea in mind. I'm not sure though. **

**A/N2: There's pretty graphic S.I in here so please don't read if there's any chance you could be triggered. **

Chapter 2

"What are you writing?" Emily asked as she watched Spencer typing at her laptop. They had retired to Spencer's house after school and were currently sitting in Spencer's kitchen drinking coffee, made by Emily of course much to Spencer's displeasure.

"I'm researching the French revolution." Spencer answered, glancing up from what she was typing.

Emily responded with a teasing smirk. "Don't you already know everything there is to know about the French revolution, or any other revolution for that matter?"

"Ha-ha." Spencer deadpanned with a roll of her eyes. She half closed the lid of her laptop, deciding to take a break for a few minutes. "Where are Hanna and Aria?"

"Hanna is with Caleb and Aria is with Mr Fitz." Emily answered, absently trailing her fingers along the rim of her cup. "They said something about needing some couple time."

"Alright." Spencer fixed Emily with a curious look. "I know why I'm sitting in my kitchen drinking coffee while researching for a paper that hasn't even been set yet but why are you here?"

"Are you trying to get rid of me?" Emily joked.

"I'm serious, why aren't you with Paige?"

Emily shrugged. "She had something to do."

"You guys aren't fighting, are you?"

"You suddenly care?" Emily asked not unkindly. "A few months ago you would have been arranging some kind of celebration at the first sign of trouble between me and Paige."

"I don't have a problem with Paige." Spencer said sincerely. "I just want you to be happy."

"I know." Emily smiled. "Don't worry, Paige and I are fine. We're…great actually."

Spencer leaned forward slightly, her own smile tugging at her lips in response to the pure elation in Emily's voice. "You're really happy?"

"I'm more than happy." Emily said with a slightly disbelieving shake of her head. "After everything that happened, I didn't think I'd ever be able to feel like this again."

"I'm really happy for you." Spencer said earnestly. "Paige and I aren't the best of friends but she obviously loves you and that's good enough of a reason for me to like her."

"Thanks." Emily mumbled, bashfully ducking her head to contain her grin. Though Paige had yet to say the words her actions made it abundantly clear that she did love Emily with all her heart. Emily awkwardly cleared her throat and was about to speak up again when Spencer's phone vibrated on the counter. Emily's gaze instantly sprang up, worry etching across her face like it always did when any of them got a text message. Spencer picked up the phone and Emily watched her expression closely for any sign that there was something wrong. The sharp inhale and the way Spencer almost dropped the phone in fright made it clear that there was indeed something very wrong.

"Spencer?" Emily asked in concern. "What does it say?"

Spencer offered up the phone and Emily hesitantly took it. When she looked at the screen she almost dropped the phone when her eyes landed on a picture of Aria walking down a street alone. There was a gloved hand in front of the camera, brandishing a knife. The phone vibrated again and Emily had to scramble to keep from dropping it from her loosened grip. She pushed the button to open the message and waited with baited breath. When it opened her brow furrowed in confusion.

"What?" Spencer asked urgently, already up and out of her seat. "What does it say?"

"If you want to stop this, get your lip lock on. Don't do it half assed, do it properly. I'll know. A."

"That sounds pervy for A." Spencer noted, slightly troubled by the unambiguous blackmail. Neverthless she walked around the table to stand in front of Emily. "Come on, let's get this over with."

"What?" Emily leaned back slightly on the stool she was sitting on as if to avoid whatever Spencer was about to do. "No! Spencer, we can't. I'm with Paige."

"Emily, A just threatened Aria's life." Spencer replied seriously, her concern for Aria overriding any sort of understanding of Emily's worries. "We don't have time to argue about this."

Emily wavered for a moment before she begrudgingly straightened back up. "Fine but you're doing all the work."

Spencer exhaled impatiently and stepped closer. "You heard what A said, we have to do this properly."

Emily was about to argue when Spencer leaned forward and kissed her without warning, probably just to interrupt her. Emily wobbled slightly at the sudden movement and she grasped Spencer's upper arms to keep herself steady.

Spencer's hands moved to Emily's neck while the other remained resting neatly on her shoulder and she allowed herself to be tugged forward to stand between Emily's parted knees. She gasped out loud when Emily lightly and most likely accidentally bit down on her bottom lip. Emily wavered at the sound, guilt swirling in her gut as her thoughts inevitably went to Paige. Spencer noticed the hesitation and apprehensive of angering A, she deepened the kiss. Threading a hand into Emily's dark hair she lightly licked at her lower lip, requesting access that was almost instantly granted. When her tongue slipped past Emily's lips she hummed in satisfaction at the bitter taste of coffee mixed with something that was purely Emily. The moment was cut short by a thump from across the room which caused them to quickly pull away. They glanced towards the doorway where the sound had originally come from and Emily paled.

XXX

Paige smiled to herself as she walked up to Spencer's front porch. About half an hour ago she'd gotten a text from Emily requesting that she come to Spencer's house because she missed her. A thrill of glee ran through her at the thought of Emily missing her as she approached the door. As promised in the text the door was slightly ajar. Paige pushed it open and quietly stepped into the unfamiliar house. She heard voices from the next room and realising that she didn't have any idea where she was going she wisely decided to follow them. The voices stopped after a couple of moments but she continued to head in the same direction. She stepped into the kitchen and stopped short, her breath catching in her throat as she took in the scene with wide eyes. Emily was perched on a stool, with Spencer standing between her legs as they kissed each other senseless. From her vantage point near the door Paige heard Spencer gasp into the kiss and watched her thread her hand into Emily's hair, pressing even closer to her. With tears blurring her vision Paige watched the scene for a few long moments until her knees buckled and she was forced to throw out a hand to steady herself.

The sound of Paige's hand colliding with the doorframe broke the silence in the room and both Emily and Spencer turned towards the source of the sound. As soon as Emily laid eyes on Paige she paled and quickly used her hands on Spencer's arms to push her away. "Paige, this isn't what it looks like."

Paige was too focused on trying to breathe through the tightness in her chest to listen to what Emily was saying. She replayed the last few seconds in her head and full realisation dawned on her "I-I don't…"

"Paige…" Emily eased herself off the chair and took a small step closer to her girlfriend.

As soon as Emily tried to close the distance between them Paige whirled around and rushed out of the door on shaky legs. She could feel herself breaking down bit by bit, her heart clenching too painfully in her chest as she stumbled her way back the way she'd come, her earlier elation long forgotten about. She could hear Emily following her but she refused to answer her calls to come back. Instead she picked up her pace in her haste to get away.

"Paige, please wait. I can explain."

Just as Paige reached the front door Emily grabbed her wrist and turned her around none too gently.

"Paige, just listen."

Paige felt the last of her defences fall and a sharp sob sprang unwittingly from her throat as her tears continued to flow.

"Paige, please don't cry." Emily pleaded even as she teared up herself. She only succeeded in drawing another sob from Paige's throat and she instinctively moved forward to hug her.

Just as Emily moved forward to hug her Paige caught sight of Spencer and betrayal fuelled anger rose in her gut. She threw up her arms and shoved Emily backwards, causing her to stumble. Paige felt a pang of guilt but instead of allowing herself to dwell on it she pulled open the door and rushed outside.

"PAIGE!" Emily yelled, running after her. She was too slow however as Paige was on her bike and away before Emily managed to reach her. "PAIGE, WAIT!" Paige showed no signs of hearing and Emily scrambled to pull her phone out her jacket pocket. She was surprised to her pockets empty and quickly put two and two together. A must have set the whole thing up. Paige disappeared from Emily's sight and she quickly spun around to Spencer who was staring at her phone in confusion.

"What does this mean?" Spencer asked in confusion as she held out the phone.

Emily snatched the phone away and her tear filled eyes quickly scanned over the message.

'Relapsing is a bitch – A'.

"Relapsing is a bitch." Emily muttered out loud, trying to figure out what the words meant. "Relapsing is a bitch."

"_That's from one of my relapses._" _Paige said as she watched Emily trail a finger over the inch wide scar just above her knee. "I got carried away."_

_Emily glanced up at Paige to see her attention had been drawn away from the movie they were watching in favour of staring at her intently. "Carried away?"_

"_I cut too deep." Paige said with an embarrassed smile. "I kind of panicked afterwards." _

_Emily's brow furrowed as she traced her finger over the pink scar. It felt raised and slightly rough under her fingertip in contrast to the rest of Paige's skin. "Why did you panic?"_

"_It wouldn't stop bleeding." Paige explained quietly. "I didn't have any butterfly strips to use and it just…" she paused for a moment, apparently caught up in the memory. Emily glanced up from where Paige's legs were resting on her lap to see that Paige's eyes had fluttered shut. "It wouldn't stop bleeding. I remember that it took a while to even start bleeding after I'd cut so I was worried that I'd cut something I wasn't supposed to."_

"_Paige." Emily spoke softly as she moved her hand to rest on Paige's lower leg, consciously keeping her hand away from the scar. Paige opened her eyes and focused on Emily. "What did you do?"_

"_I wanted to call somebody but I remembered that I had nobody to call." Paige said with a sad smile. "So I waited until the bleeding slowed and bandaged it as well as I could. It was fine." _

_Emily watched with a troubled expression as Paige shrugged sheepishly and turned back to the TV screen. _

An involuntary whimper escaped Emily's throat upon realizing what the text meant. The wild, hurt look in Paige's eyes, the thoughts that were probably going through her mind, the mildly threatening message from A which suggested he or she was going to do something to make the situation worse…everything came together in Emily's mind and she turned towards Spencer with wide, terror filled eyes. "You have to drive me to Paige's house." she said urgently as she grasped Spencer's arm and began to tug her towards the car.

"What about Aria?" Spencer argued, resisting the tugging. "A is following her. We can't leave her in danger just because Paige's feelings are…"

"_PAIGE_ IS IN DANGER!" Emily practically yelled through her tears. "Please Spencer, I don't have my car and I don't know what she's going to do. _Please_. You can call Aria in the car!"

"You don't know what she'll do?" Spencer echoed in concern. "What does that mean?"

"Spencer…"

Something about the way Emily was practically sobbing her desperate pleas stirred something in Spencer and she reluctantly relented. "Okay! Okay, I'll just get my keys."

"Thank you." Emily said, dashing the tears from her cheeks as Spencer pulled away and rushed back to the house to get her keys.

**-TWTWTW-**

Paige burst into her bedroom and slammed the door behind her, not caring about the loud slam that resulted. Her phone vibrated and Paige yanked it out of her pocket, half expecting to see a text from Emily. Instead as she squinted past her tears she saw that the text message was from a blocked number. She opened it and quickly read the message.

'Ignorance isn't always bliss. You knew this would happen. –A'

A choked sob sounded from Paige's throat and with a yell of frustration she hurled her phone across the room. It hit the far wall and dropped to the floor in pieces. Paige was too focused on her thoughts to notice or care about the mishap. The message was right, the thought of there being something more than friendship between Emily and Spencer had occurred to her quite a few times. It would certainly explain the instant dislike Spencer had taken to her and the reason the two were always giving each other meaningful looks when they thought other people weren't watching. Paige threaded her hands through her hair as tears slipped relentlessly down her cheeks. She'd known that Emily could never want to be with someone like her, that she could never _love_ someone like her when she could have anyone she wanted, Spencer included. Paige dropped her hands, her face a sudden mask of calm despite the tightening knot in her chest. She still had a razor in her drawers. Just once, she had enough self-control just to cut once. She staggered numbly over to her dresser and yanked the top drawer open with more force than she intended to. It came right out of her dresser and crashed to the floor, causing her to stagger backwards. She didn't pay attention to the mess and instead began to dig through the drawer, throwing clothes this way and that. Finally she found what she was looking for in the form of an unused blade. She walked over to the bed and mindlessly shucking her jeans down, sunk onto it. She kicked her shoes and her jeans off before swinging her legs up onto the bed. The blade was pressed against her skin before she could even think about the ramifications of what she was about to do and with one violent tug to the right she dragged the blade across her thigh. The stinging pain offered a moment of clarity against Paige's intense emotional haze but it wasn't nearly enough to satisfy the dark craving inside.

"Should have seen it." She muttered to herself through her tears as she pressed the blade against her thigh and dragged it across her skin, this time slightly slower so that the pain lasted longer. Paige watched in fascination as dots of blood sprang to the cuts but quickly refocused, moving to press the blade back to her skin above the two parallel lines. Just as she was about to drag the blade across her thigh again the door sprang open and Paige froze in place.

Emily burst into the room and gasped at the sight of Paige bleeding on the bed, a razor blade in her blood covered hand. A startled yelp sounded from behind her, indicating that Spencer had also seen what was going on. Emily had avoided her concerned questions on the way there because she knew that Paige wouldn't want Spencer to know what was going on but she couldn't stop her from following her into the house. Spencer could sense that something serious was going on and she'd been worried, plus she'd found the spare key while Emily was trying and failing to kick the front door down.

Emily was still for a moment before she spurred herself into action, hurrying over to Paige's side. "Spencer, get out!"

"But…" Spencer watched helplessly as Emily tore the small blade from Paige's hand and threw it on the bed before grabbing the edge of the sheets to press against the cuts.

"SPENCER!" Emily yelled, making brief eye contact with her friend. "Just get out! I've got this."

Spencer wavered for a moment before nodding briefly and turning to walk out of the room, closing the door behind her.

"Paige?" Emily placed her free hand on Paige's cheek, gently forcing their eyes to meet. Paige's eyes were vacant as if she was in shock. "Paige. _Paige, look at me_. PAIGE!"

Paige blinked a few times and finally focused on Emily's concerned face. "Emily…"

Emily gave a sob of relief and moved forward, wrapping her free arm around Paige's neck to drag her into a tight hug.

Paige was frozen for a moment before she dissolved into tears. Pressing her face into Emily's neck she clung to her tightly, the pain in her thigh intensifying. Emily maneuvered herself onto the bed without breaking the hug and they stayed like that for a few minutes, both of them crying in earnest.

Finally Paige pulled back to wipe her eyes. "I-I'm sorry. You shouldn't have to see me like this. It's not like we're da…"

"Don't!" Emily snapped tearfully. "Don't you _dare_ say that. You're not breaking up with me, okay? I'm not letting you break up with me."

Paige choked on a sob and ducked her head. She hadn't been suggesting that she was going to break up with Emily; she thought Emily breaking up with her in favour of Spencer was already a done deal.

Emily stared at Paige for a long moment, torn between wanting to explain everything and the need to get something to treat the obviously deep cuts with. "I'll be right back."

Paige nodded and Emily got up off the bed and walked over the dresser drawer on the floor. She immediately spotted Paige's first aid supplies and retrieved them before walking back over to the bed. She clambered onto the bed to kneel between Paige's legs and placed the first aid items next to her.

"Emily…" Paige murmured as she watched Emily move the sheet from her thigh. It was slightly stuck because of the drying blood so Emily had to give it a light tug to pull it back. When the cuts were revealed Emily had to bite her lip to hold back her tears.

"Oh Paige…"

Paige wanted to apologize but she knew that wasn't what Emily would want to hear. No doubt Emily would say it wasn't her fault and shoulder the blame herself anyway.

"What you saw at Spencer's…" Emily began as she picked up a small bottle of peroxide and a clean white cloth. "It wasn't what you think."

"You were kissing her." Paige said, her voice coming out as a thin broken accusation.

"I was." Emily confirmed softly as she opened the bottle of peroxide and poured some onto the cloth in her hand. "But it wasn't what you think." She momentarily met Paige's eyes to make sure that she was listening before she dropped her gaze back to Paige's blood covered thigh. Starting around the outside of the blood covered area, she gently began to wipe it with the small cloth. The cloth instantly reddened as the blood was wiped up. "Spencer and I were hanging out and A sent her a picture. It showed Aria walking down a street alone…or almost alone. A was following her with a knife."

"So you made out to feel better?" Paige asked harshly, the hurt still fresh.

"We made out so that A would leave Aria alone." Emily corrected, briefly looking up from what she was doing. "That's what A does. They send us text messages to make us do things we don't want to do."

"I got a message from your phone." Paige murmured in realisation. "Telling me to go to Spencer's house…and then I got a message from A."

"I can't find my phone." Emily said as she stopped dabbing around the cuts and dropped the cloth onto the bed. "And I didn't send that message."

"Oh…" Paige ducked her head, mortified by what she'd done for apparently no reason at all. They fell into silence for a few minutes as Emily applied butterfly strips and a sticky bandage with a clinical eye. As clinical as Emily was acting, when she finally finished and looked up Paige wasn't surprised to find tears flooding her eyes.

"I'm so sorry." Paige whispered, biting her lip against her own oncoming tears. "I really fucked up this time, didn't I?"

Emily shook her head and moved to sit next to Paige instead of kneeling in front of her. She wrapped her arms around her and hugged her close, pressing a firm kiss to the top of her head before she spoke up.

"You're not the one of us who messed up." Emily whispered into Paige's hair. "I should have known."

"And I shouldn't be so screwed up." Paige said, gripping the arm across her chest for dear life. "If I wasn't so stupid and _crazy_…"

"You're not crazy." Emily said, giving Paige a light squeeze. "I don't think that for a second."

"Spencer will." Paige whispered tearfully as she huddled closer to Emily. "She saw."

"I don't care what Spencer thinks." Emily said sharply, still slightly annoyed at her friend.

"I'm sorry." Paige whispered again, slightly choked up. "I won't do it again."

"I know you won't." Emily whispered her voice hardening in determination. "I'm throwing your blades out. All of them, including any that I find in the future. I can't let you keep them, I can't risk…"

Emily's voice cracked and Paige clutched at her tighter. "I'm sorry."

"I know." Emily whispered, blinking back tears. "I know you are. It's going to be okay. We'll be okay."

Paige nodded silently, somehow aware that Emily was speaking the truth.

THE END(?)


End file.
